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| How Do I Choose the Best Custody Schedule for My Child? |
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| Written by Lucia Baker |
| Monday, 23 January 2012 09:37 |
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The question always arises as to the conditions in which it is Biblically permissible to divorce. Even among Christians, opinions run the gamut. Scripture is hardly used, partly used or completely taken out of context to all to satisfy opinion. It's safe to say, human beings can justify just about everything--just give us a few minutes! With so many opinions floating around what can the Christian contemplating divorce rely on? I find 3 scenarios in which one might thinking about divorce might locate him or her self and find a godly solution. Jesus reminds us of the power of forgiveness in overcoming offense. When that offense is adultery and forgiveness is in short supply divorce can occur, according to Matthew 19:8, and 9.
The question always arises as to the conditions in which it is Biblically permissible to divorce. Even among Christians, opinions run the gamut. Scripture is hardly used, partly used or completely taken out of context to all to satisfy opinion. It's safe to say, human beings can justify just about everything--just give us a few minutes! With so many opinions floating around what can the Christian contemplating divorce rely on? I find 3 scenarios in which one might thinking about divorce might locate him or her self and find a godly solution. Jesus reminds us of the power of forgiveness in overcoming offense. When that offense is adultery and forgiveness is in short supply divorce can occur, according to Matthew 19:8, and 9. What is the age of my child? Different ages create their own advantages/disadvantages when choosing a custody schedule. It will be vastly different if you have an infant, school-age child, or teenager. Research your child's age and needs so you have a baseline to start from. For example, and infant or toddler needs a "home base" while a teenager can easily spend longer periods of time with one parent. School age children like to spend time with both parents and see their support. But, for the rest of us, we're in this divorce pool of life. I think a lot of us fell in love with the fantasy, and then when reality finally came, we didn't know what to do with it. We didn't know how to make the changes necessary as fantasy slowly started drifting into reality. We didn't know how to make the relationship work, because we did not have the capability to make that relationship work based on our past experiences in all of our past relationship. Our past relationships will always form who we are today, and if we're able to process our past relationships, we are then able to move forward and have great relationships. Each one better and more positive than the one before. The probably is that most of us don't spend enough time actually processing our past relationships. We tend to sweep all of our issues under the rug. We tend to get involved in another relationship too quickly because we're in the "replacement theory" of relationships, which I've written about. Or, we fall in love with a new fantasy of what we think this new person is and what they're all about. What custody schedules work best with my child's personality? Your child has their own unique personality which needs to be considered. For example, can your child handle being moved back and forth from each home multiple times a week or would they do better staying for longer periods. Does your child need a simple consistent lifestyle that does not cause them any additional stress or anxiety? Does your child like change and can stay on top of all their responsibilities? Also what is your child's relationship with each parent? Would they find it easier to stay more at one home than the other? There are many different schedule types to meet your needs. You can choose the percentage of time with each parent, how often the child changes homes, when the exchanges happen, etc. Research all the different custody schedule options available to you. Does my child have any special needs that need to be considered? Each child is special and unique. Every issue should be considered. If your child is struggling or excelling in school, it would be easier if you allowed them to stay in the same school. Does your child have any medical or mental conditions like asthma or ADD? Are they involved in any special activities like league sports or a performing group? I'm a firm believer that love exists, but it's got to be real love and it's got to be a love that's based on mutual love for each other. You do for each other what the other needs, and you respect one another so that you are able to grow with one another and be each others best friends. Most relationships tend to outgrow one another. Most relationships grow their separate ways. California DUI Lawyers Qualities of a Injury Law Firms to Retain |